According to no lesser organ than The Trentonian, in Jeff Edelstein’s column he says ‘Former Pentagon officials are coming out and saying aliens have visited us.”

Even the New York Times reports that the Pentagon’s program – known as Advanced Aerospace Threat Identification Program – has been quietly checking into UFOs for some time, and the stuff they found is ‘earth-shaking.’

‘Coming out’ in the New York Times is massive. Sean Waslylyk, who is the director of Fringe New Jersey, is dazzled by the news. He notes “It’s fascinating what’s come out. Not only has the Pentagon admitted to this programme, not only has the Department of Defense released video footage of UFO’s but it’s also been reported where the recovered metal alloys are going (stored in buildings outside Las Vegas, by Bigelow Aerospace.)

Finally! Someone addressing the elephant in the room.

I interviewed one Elizabeth Klarer, in March 1983 for my Just Jani Column.

This is what I wrote:

Once upon a time a little three-year-old saffron-haired girl looked up into the sky on her parent’s farm near Mooiriver in Natal and saw a flying saucer.

Nanny didn’t quite know how to explain the pumpkin-sized shape whizzing across the horizon, bur for heaven’s sakes it was 1913 and who had ever heard of flying saucers?

Four years later a similar vision vroomed across the veldt.

This time Elizabeth, for that was the little girl’s name, was with her sister Barbara.

Elizabeth knew with the certainty that only a seven-year-old can have, that people were living out there and her life was going to be inextricably bound up with them.

Elizabeth was educated at St Anne’s. She grew up to become an accomplished musician. She studied in Florence. She also became a world-renowned meteorologist (Cambridge-trained) and internationally recognized expert on UFOs. During World War II, she held a responsible position in Air Force Intelligence.

One day in 1954 our Liz saw a flash in the Natal sky and an enormous circular ship appeared and hovered (just like in the comic books.)

The hull was spinning, but the dome in the centre was stationary.

A man of extreme handsomeness was gazing at her through the port-hole.

“Oh he was very handsome indeed,’ remembers Elizabeth, patting her auburn bun. “Tall, with an angular face and hair that was greying at the temples.”

But the vibes were not quite on beam and the space-ship departed as suddenly as it had come.

Eighteen months later, the spaceship landed in the exact same spot and the extra-terrestrial Cillian Murphy (actually I wrote ‘Paul Newman’) clone stepped outside. (Times change and so do turn-ons.)

Elizabeth Klarer with a painting of Akon.

“I knew no fear,” smiles Ms Klarer. At over 70, she is still classically beautiful in the gin and Jag mould of one of Natal’s better families.

“He had the most compelling, hypnotic eyes…and I ran straight into his arms.”

(I’ll swear her breast was heaving ever so slightly under her trendy gypsy blouse.)

“He said to me ‘This time you’re not afraid, are you?”

Well, what’s a girl to do when she falls head-over-heels with a heart-stoppingly handsome hunk who literally invites her to ‘Come fly with me?”

Liz, let Akon – that was his name – literally lead her into the space-ship and she spent one earthtime day visiting the mothership.

“Very much like the one in Close Encounters, except that the film people made it look like a gin palace”.

She also visited the planet Meton in the star system Alpha Centauri, where Akon is an astro-physicist.

Akon explained to our ravishing red-head that “Our civilization existed on Earth eons ago when we moved out from the mother planet Venus. We were advised by our scientists to do so at that time in the history of the Sun’s system as the Sun is breathing out its breath of life in the cosmic cycle of solar expansion.”

Liz-babe is no lettuce-head. She tumbled right away to Akon’s chatter about the ‘electron density in the earth ionosphere, the ‘tenuous corona which extends from the visible disk and magnetic fields of mega-galaxies.”

Now, 28 years on, Elizabeth Klarer, sitting in a comfy chair in her little antique-filled house called, appropriately enough, ‘Enchanted Cottage’ in Towerby, Johannesburg, tells the story as though it happened yesterday.

Her serene face, scarcely touched by the passage of time, glows as she speaks.

She describes in the minutest detail the beautiful Nordic-like race which has discovered the elixir of youth and lives in a space-age 400-million year-old Utopia in a state of total harmony.

Etched in photographic clarity in her memory, too, are their buildings, lifestyle and philosophy.

“They eat only natural foods. But they like their wine, oh dear, they like their wine.” She smiles dreamily.

Two years later on April 7, 1956, Akon and Elizabeth became lovers. She describes the union in her book ‘Beyond the Light Barrier.’

‘I surrendered in ecstasy to the magic of his love-making, our bodies merging in magnetic union as the diving essence of our spirits became one.”

“I found the true meaning of love in mating with a man from another planet. She holds out her tiny hand showing me the silver ring Akon gave her.

Ms Klarer, then – and still – married to the late Major Fielding, ex-British Intelligence broadcaster and artist, claims to have given birth to Akon’s son .

Ayling is now 21 and lives with his father on Meton.

Major Fielding, when asked what he thought of his wife’s extra-terrestrial extra-marital affair, bristled gently and busied himself with his paintbrushes and canvases.

“My wife’s been in love with a space-man for twenty years,” he grumbles. ‘That’s all right with me – as long as he stays in space where he belongs.”

Each year on April 7 Elizabeth returns to Flying Saucer Hill in Natal for the anniversary of their union – and each year he has been there.

She plays a snatch of Scarlatti on her celeste.

“Does Akon know that you play?” I ask timidly.

“Of course my dear. He knows everything. He’ll read your article. He’s been to this cottage, but he doesn’t like Johannesburg. Too much pollution. He fixed my MG the other day.”

Elizabeth still has work to do on planet Earth, including finishing a book on the military and political aspects of UFO research. But when her mission is completed Akon will fetch her…

Before I leave, Ms Klarer makes a call to the bookshop.

“I want you to send a copy of the book to Jani,’ she instructs in her tiny, quavering voice. “And there’s to be no charge. Akon wouldn’t like it.”

I still have it.

Elizabeth Klarer died at age 84, in 1994, leaving her second book The Gravity File unfinished. The book would have filled in the gaps of the first, besides explaining Akon’s “electro-gravity propulsion” technology.

Dear Katy Perry. You are only 30 years out of date